Flowers On Norton St

Who would have thought that flowers would be such a tricky thing to buy? I mean, they’re not, really. They’re not tricky to buy in the sense of, you can’t find them anywhere, (that’s what the future will be like, do you think Mad Max ever bought flowers?)
They’re tricky to buy in the sense more thought goes into them than one would expect.
I walked into Flowers on Norton, and immediately I was confused. I had no idea what I was doing, my confidence vanished, it was like the photosynthesis of a nearby germanium had sucked my ability to talk from me. I was intimidated.
«I’d like some flowers please.» I said, which was a bad start, as it got me off on the foot that made me look like an idiot.
«What kind of flowers?» she asked. Obviously I wanted flowers, I was in a florists.
Did she really expect me to name them? I’m not a botanist, I just want ones that look nice, that aren’t too massive, a token to suit the occasion.
She ran me through some flowers, asking about price range. Price range? I don’t know, I didn’t know how much flowers cost. I didn’t want to say something too low and look cheap. ‘You’re buying someone a bouquet, how nice, but you’re not that nice, because it’s a bouquet of weeds.‘
Eventually we came to an understanding and I told her what I wanted to spend, she showed me some flowers and I accepted, then she offered to put foliage in for an extra $ 5.
«Like leaves and stuff?» I asked like a complete noon. (Noon isn’t a degrading term, but it sounds like it could be.) «Greenery», she corrected.
She went out back and prepared the flowers, (to the back of the shop, not the Australian desert) and I waited and looked around at the other flowers, gifts and incense that they sold.
Despite feeling like an absolute noon, I managed to get out of there with some nice flowers surrounded by greenery in my price range, and my lack of knowledge and experience at flower buying has been cleverly masked by the professionalism of the somewhat dry florist, masked completely, that is, unless she reads this.