Mr Simms Olde Sweet Shoppe

Surely nobody reading this is too young to remember the single released by Chef from South Park (voiced by soul singer Isaac Hayes) imploring listeners to ‘suck on his chocolate salty balls’. Well, am I the only one who thought that sounded really appetising?
Chocolate and salt that is, sheesh! I’ve long been a fan of sweet and savoury combinations. Pineapple and cheese, strawberry and black pepper, Pretzel Flipsz (where the hell *are* you now?!?), and so imagine by delight when I was drawn into Mr Simms during a lull in my day at Stockport’s Vintage Village and happened upon a bag of Maldon Salt Caramel chocolate chunks. Hello, little bag. My foodgasm’s in there waiting for me.
The prices may put some off Mr Simms, but as someone who bakes, makes preserves and fashions the occasional chocolate truffle, I know just how flipping expensive half decent ingredients can be. My treats were this and a block of peanut butter chocolate swiftly purchased, but I’d have happily spent the whole day in there browsing the retro sweets was there not pressing Unilocal work to be done; bon bons, cola cubes, rainbow belts, humbugs… everything you can think of. The lovely assistant at the counter even took it upon herself to compliment me on my hair and make-​up. (We’d gone 1940s style for the VE Day Vintage Village.)
There are fewer things I’ve had in my mouth (careful now) that are nicer than Mr Simms chocolate salty… chunks. For that, I’m willing to break the bank every now and again. Stockport, once more I salute you!