Fifth Avenue Marina

Don’t drink the water.
Swimming is forbidden.
Children are welcome, but only as part of the menu.
There isn’t even coffee or wifi.
You might get skurvy.

I LOVE THIS PLACE!
I got to know about the 5^th Avenue Marina when I started storing my kayaks at the Kayak Hotel located in the marina. I have stored my kayaks there for about nine years and have never encountered any problems. I have even come off the water in the wee hours in the morning without seeing anyone lurking around. There are lots of artists, the community ties and of course the Kayak Hotel. Just be sure to tell Vinnie you are not a yuppie!

this place is unsafe… I was harassed, and freaked out by the obviously homeless people who inhabit the area, and I have tough skin. The parking is dark, and the general feel is that you need to watch your back.
If you have to be there for some reason, don’t go alone…

Don’t listen to Vinnie… he’s just afraid of being gentrified out of the place. There’s an awesome wine and tapas bar, and I heard Abercrombie is putting in a flagship store here. This place would look right at home in an Ikea display. Super clean, comfortable, and safe.

It’s a nice spot. Secluded and away from all the prying eyes. Great place for a bonfire.

Mostly inhabited by juicers and meth freaks.

Uh, don’t anyone go there.
Just stay away.
It’s boring and no one wants you there.
especially Yuppies. They’re definitely not welcome.
STAY AWAY EX DOT COMMERS!
Go to Jack London square or something.
No one cares if your an artist…
Theres nothing to see, keep walking…

AAARRRRRRRR!!!
Avast, ye mateys. This here be th’ most rickety, barnacle crusted haven in all o’ Dead Man’s Estuary. And by Dead Man’s Estuary I mean San Francisco Bay. No foolin’ ol’ Cap’n Zacharius Half-​Beard — this be the Queen’s jools.
Lissen up, ye scalawags: ye gots to earn yer sea legs afore ye can learn to keep yer balance on these creaky, swaying slats. There’s a feelin’ in the very bones ‘a this place, strewn as it were with artifacts of wrought iron and broken mirrors… inhabited, as it were, by Chinamen on permanent drunk, young ruffians carousing at all hours in their moored skiffs, and one-​eyed mongrel pups that cock their head to the side and look at ye as though castin’ the evil eye.
Aye, laddies, ol’ Cap’n Half-​Beard is rudderless and lackin’ a seawarthy vessel. But if ol’ Half-​Beard were ever to procure a ship, and mayhaps learn to sail even, then ye can bet yer bilge I’d only be seen berthing in the rough hewn slips of the legendary Fifth Ave Marina.