The Tanker

Relaxed, clean, and open interior.
The Thursday I came, it was an exclusively younger, but thank god not hipster, crowd.
Decent run of vintage Johnny Cash on the playlist.

Piña coladas here are the JAM! I’m really looking forward to the upcoming tiki nights!!! This is the only metal head/​sports/​tiki bar in Portland, and if the other bars know what’s good for them, they won’t even try and compete. Joey is one of the most accommodating and friendly bar keeps around!!!

My boyfriend and I came in here on a Sunday night and to my surprise they played the new Walking Dead episode which was awesome. The bartender was really friendly and the jukebox was very decent. Great experience for 2 out of towners!

I love Tanker. Everyone there is awesome and skeeball is only a quarter a game and drink prices are reasonable. Plus, it’s rarely very crowded, which I guess other people don’t like but I am very happy about.

My friend and I went to tanker tonight for a rum and coke and vodka and pineapple and it was weak as shit and we
the bar tender about how weak the drinks were and he was like sorry and walked away. We didn’t even finish our drinks
Laaaaaaaaaaame! Flat ass cheeks.

Bar was very small and poorly lit so you couldn’t tell what is on tap. They were playing The Devil Wears Prada on the TVs — no one paid for the jukebox, so the stereo system was blasting the sound from that complete with the commercials.
Skeeball machine ate the last ball and got stuck and the pinball machine ate $ 1 in quarters before we gave up on it. Basic beer selection. The place was empty on a Saturday night.
The whole place was very clean and the bathrooms were really nice.

Another damn solid bar on Hawthorne that I had the chance to check out on my most recent visit to Portland!
A bar with cheap drinks, a laid back vibe, cool staff, plus some skee-​ball AND table top pac-​man? What’s not to love, honestly? It’d be nice to find some more places like this in my own back yard, but hey, I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before I’m back in Portland. And perhaps I’ll find myself at this spot again as well!

This is our spot, our bar away from home, where we love to kick it. Great vibe, great music, chill bartenders. We love the Buck Hunter too!

Great place to chill and have some drinks with some friends. Good atmosphere to watch a game to. Drinks are great and you definitely get your fill. We’re adding this spot to our rotations of regular bars to go to.

All I can say is I absolutely love the Tanker! Coming from the midwest (like we all do…) I have never felt more at home in Portland than at the Tanker. Cheap drinks, quality conversations, and friendly bartenders. Joseph, keep the vodka tonics coming!
Hint, hint: ask about joining the whiskey club, the can club, or any other activity they have going on. At the end of trying all the whiskey’s or cans of beer they have (which is a lot) you receive a t-​shirt. It’s totally neat!

I thought this bar was no where worth the raves and reviews it’s getting. Sure, it’s clean, the drinks are reasonable – my two $ 6 cocktails were nothing extraordinary – the beer selection is pretty standard, the bartenders are kind; I get it. But really, the atmosphere was mild, quiet and not at all what we expected considering the raves we read on Unilocal.
The place cleared out two minutes after the Timbers game, which to me says it’s only a bar you visit because of the big TVs – not the atmosphere. Personally, we enjoy nights out at the bars for the fun-​loving crowds, the entertainment of a good venue, and the quirks you can’t get anywhere else. To us, this missed it all.
We loved the skee-​ball, but otherwise The Tanker wasn’t anything to write home about. Maybe we came on a bad night? I thought a Saturday would be a little more exciting! We’ll take a pass next time we’re in the area.

We enjoyed a few drinks here one Sunday afternoon. The place is really clean, the service was friendly, and the drinks were a bargain at happy hour. We’ll definitely be returning.

I think THIS is the best bar around. Sure, others have swank and swagger, but this one has character all it’s own shown off by the patrons of the bar. The bartenders won’t bite, unless you give them reason to. I for sure wouldn’t tempt them.
NACHOS ARE $ 4 and I LOVE THEM!
Beer flows at the rate you want and they won’t pour you broke with their selection… unless you are too drunk to notice how many you are ordering. I can go get a few beers, a late night happy hour eat and walk out spending under $ 15!
Still not convinced? I don’t care. I found this place when I wandered from a party at my friend’s house and happened to notice this bar open at 1:15a. I walked in, ordered a beer, and got to know some of the patrons. I see them there often and it’s a nice feeling when you walk into a bar and people smile/​wave knowing who you are. *Cheers* ;)

I don’t think you could have a bad time at Tanker if you tried. Whether you’re there to watch a game, play some pinball/​table top pac man, play some tunes on the juke, and/​or just get your drank on for a dime, Tanker will supply. For example, when we arrived, the Timbers were in the process of losing a match. The bar was crowded, but not uncomfortably so (we snagged 2 bar stools) with enthusiastic fans. They were not like the fans I’m used to seeing in Boston. They were civilized, friendly even, and did not turn The Tanker into a douche canoe. Still, it was all about the sporting event. It’s cool though, I like a place that is multi-​dimensional. Tanker likes sports but knows how to knit too.
Once the game was over, the place changed a bit. The dudes left and were replaced by not guys. Noice! All I’m saying is, I like girls better. So, I put some music on the juke box (I don’t know why others didn’t) and got to drinking. We had like 4 or 5 craft cocktails and one «mystery shot,» and spent less than twenty bucks. That’s a hell of a deal! And the folks who populated Tanker in the evening seemed a-​ok too, not that I was out making the rounds. And the staff was totally great. I did chat with them, and they were super friendly. They had a nice chemistry with one another too. They liked each other and seemed to be genuinely having a good time.
So about that mystery shot. They have 6 bottles of liquor in numbered paper bags. You roll the dice (1 die really) and get a shot of whatever number comes up. No one tells you what you got, you just drink it and try to figure it out. You might get a nice whiskey, or you might get banana rum. Guess which one I ended up with. It was fun though, trying to distinguish the flavors. Is it bubble gum? Tropical? A bartender will probably tell you if you pester them enough. I liked it, even though the shot itself was pretty vile.
Oh, and as for parking, there is plenty. They’re called side streets and you walk a block from them. That is convenient.

I am a fan, we went there and the drinks were strong and inexpensive, I amazed at how much I enjoyed this place. We did go on Halloween but the bartender was very chill. The clientele was very relaxed as well.
I also thought it cool that you can get an app for your phone and be able to use it to program the jukebox.

Arrived a little after 9pm for Naughty Bingo which I heard was fun, oh, and it’s free.
Walked in and it was fairly full but not packed.
Pros:
Fabulous fresh Mac & Cheese (generous portion for $ 6.50) and a mighty good Porter on tap.
Friendly staff
Cons:
over heated
parking can be hard to find

Meh-​tacular.
The good: they were playing Man V Food on the tvs. They had the iced tea vodka that I like.
The bad? Nothing really, I guess. It just wasn’t that good.
Three words: cross the street. Or walk further west.

Came here on a Thursday night, not too crowded but like anything in this area it’s certainly a hipster hangout. But hipsters are mostly nice so that’s a plus.
There are a couple of things that caught my eye about Tanker. First was the fact that they were showing the movie «Saved» as aired on Lifetime on all their tv’s. Once that was over they switched to «The Terminator» on AMC. It really is a sight to behold… one young (ish) Arnold Schwarzenegger in HD. We debated if the movie was filmed before or after James Cameron was banging Kathryn Bigelow.
The other thing I noticed was the ceiling. It’s wooden and curved kind of like the inside of an old Viking ship or something. I enjoyed it very much so.
Another thing I enjoyed was the two-​dollar PBR. The minimum for a tab is $ 5 which is good for a couple of beers of any variety. The bartender that night was a super hot lady who was also really nice. I’d definitely return if I’m in the area.

Tanker’s has five beers on nitro at any given time. As far as I’m concerned, this is *the* place on Hawthorne to grab a couple of beers and unwind. It’s located in the hub of Hawthorne’s «Barmuda Triangle,» but if you’re not looking for it, this unassuming bar is easy to overlook.
I’m glad to read other reviews where people have been in and it’s packed, because each time I’ve been in it’s been so empty that the televisions are simply too loud. [Oh no — this is my second review recently where I complain about the volume of the entertainment. That can’t be good.]
The bar food is surprisingly good if you need to grab a little something with your beer, but frankly I would grab a meal elsewhere before settling in here for a couple cold ones.
The bar staff has been friendly each time I’ve been in. They know their tap selection well and can make great recommendations or steer you away from a mistake selection if asked.
Beers on nitro. Unassuming. Hidden in plain sight. I’m definitely a fan.

Where the hell did this place come from?
The Tanker popped up on my radar a few weeks ago when I stumbled across a glowing Unilocal review that mentioned beer, TV’s, and, uh, more beer. I had been meaning to check it out, but I was hesitating for some reason. I think it’s because of the logo, which for some reason makes me think of ironic trucker hats, which then gives me this feeling of utter distaste in the pit of my stomach… that same distaste I get when I run into someone rocking an ironic trucker hat, a mustache, a large belt buckle, and a pair of aviators. You know what I am talking about.
So fast forward to game day — 3^rd game of the Blazer playoffs, and day 2 of the Bridgetown Comedy Fest. I decided to head over to the Tanker to catch the game, so that I could then catch some comedy afterward (the Tanker is one of the venues for the Comedy Fest). I had no idea what I was walking in to.
The tanker looks from the outside to be a dive bar, but inside it’s actually pretty well appointed. Dark gray walls and black booths contrast a light-​colored wooden ceiling that’s rounded in an aesthetically pleasing way. The bar itself has a bunch of taps and features a pretty dang decent selection of beers (3 ninkasi taps, old speckled hen, Old Rasputin, and some others), all of which top out at $ 3.50 (a pretty great price for Tricerahops). The staff is plenty friendly, and the free popcorn is a nice touch. There are quite a few flat screens well positioned around the small bar so that a game can be seen from just about any spot in the room.
The clientele were, well, I guess, what I should have expected. Lots of ironic clothing, puffy beards, some plaid flannel, tats, tight pants, and generally what I would consider to be a «hipster crowd,» all cheering for basketball. (??) The place was PACKED to the gills, and rocking so hard I thought the roof was going to cave in. I was immediately enamored with how into the game the crowd was. It was loud and hype in there. At the same time, I was thoroughly entertained by some of the fashion choices going on. It looked like a mob of people got into a fight with a vintage clothing store and they fought to a draw. One guy was even wearing his aviators inside (it was dark in there) and rocking a stained white tee with a big hole in it right on his left bicep. That shit was super funny, but, uh, not in the way I think he meant it to be.
With the great selection of beers, the decent food, the cheaper than average prices, and the friendly staff, I could totally see myself catching a game or two here. I could also see myself grabbing a drink… maybe in the afternoon. But I would definitely avoid this place on a Friday/​Saturday night when the stumbling blocks are in full swing. I’m sure the crowd is even more ironic at that time of day.
Wherever this place came from, I’m glad it’s there. On certain occasions, it will make for a nice stop.