Michelle B

B stands for «Bestest». For without Michelle B, where would we b (e)? Even though she hounds you to put up your scary likeness on your profile.
Why the folks at Unilocal HQ have not yet bestowed upon her the Unilocal iPhone, I have no idea! (And apparently neither do they!) It’s not like we’re asking for the keys to the Unilocal helicopter.
And don’t be skeered about going to Unilocal Office Hours. It’ll be fun — not like a trip to the Principal’s office. You’ll end up with goodies. And if you’re really on your best behavior, Michelle might let you use the Unilocal iPhone. As soon as they give her one (are you listening, Unilocaleople??)
I am sworn to flattering and bribing my way into Megan’s confidence (or at least her pocketbook) so that all of Michelle’s deep dark secrets will be revealed. Because someone so perfect must certainly have deep dark secrets (and I’m not talking about Vivace, Trophy or Crazyberry either).

SAT Analogy time (said with mock enthusiasm)!!
_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​is to Seattle Unilocal as _​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​is to Christianity.
a) Liquor: Communion
b) Michael O.: Lucifer
c) Happy Hour: Sunday
d) Michelle B.: Jesus C. (What does that initial stand for again?)
e) Matt R.: The Holy Ghost
Answer is d) Michelle B. If you didn’t see that coming, read a mothaf@#*in’ book! She’s like Jesus but not in a sacrilegious way.
We should build a shrine in the middle of the city and call ourselves either Michellians or Michellites. There will be lots of booze. Who’s with me*?
*NOTE: This review has nothing to do with me becoming Elite. It is merely a coincidence!

She has a dream job and is perfect for it.
Plus, she is rocking her new brunette with bangs look!

A mysterious and highly regarded deity protected by walls of elite reviewers at Unilocal events.
More study and visits will be necessary inorder to navigate the maze leading to her. Based on what limited access I have so far, the temple is amazing.

From what I hear, she is not a communist.
Zipzap Zubidy Bop!

A goddess among mortals.
‘Nuff said.

Great service, the drinks are strong, and patio seating. Parking is not great.

She’s watched someone’s dog when she barely knew them. She’s picked up a tab or two. She’s funny and slightly sarcastic in just the way I love. She’s fair and loyal and Seattle is lucky to have her!

Michelle is one of the __[adjective]__, most __[adjective]__ and __[adjective]__ people I know. She loves to __[verb]__, __[verb]__ and __[verb]__. Her ability to __[verb]__ and __[verb]__ are __[adjective]__.
I once heard that she __[verb]__ a __[noun]__ all the way to __[location]__! A __[adjective]__ feat of __[skill]__ if ever I’ve seen it!
Michelle, while __[adjective]__ is __[emotion]__ on __[number]__ continents. Unilocalers __[distance]__ and __[distance]__ look __[direction]__ to her for __[noun]__.
Don’t __[verb]__ her though, she’s liable to __[verb]__ and __[verb]__ you __[verb]__.
a. orange
a. soft
a. short
v. climb
v. eat
v. be chased with sticks
v. think
v. drink
a. formidable
v. rode
n. northwestern pygmy mountain giraffe
l. Kona
a. ridiculous
s. n.p.m.g. handling
a. short
e. loved
n. 38
d. near
d. 4ft.
d. down
n. leadership
v. cross
v. shoot flaming nails
v. make
v. write reviews