McDonalds

I thought I’d try this particular branch of the world famous McDonalds on Sunday morning.
I’d woken up very hungover and really needed something to fix this issue. I’d looked at my watch, it was still 9.30. Damn it breakfast still had an hour to go. What was I to do?
Well I have been known to have breakfast followed lunch immediately afterwards at McDonalds and I thought this might be a good plan.
I live very close to this McDonalds about 200 meters, however after this particular nights drinking 200 meters seemed more like 1000 miles of walking over glass with no shoes through a river of chilli sauce.
I blindly put on some clothes and started walking down the street, well walking is a bit of a misleading statement, staggering, shuffling or zombying might be more accurate. For some reason my over sized shoes were not helping either. What had I been wearing last night?
I appeared to be getting a lot of strange looks as I walked down the street as well, I know I was a bit hungover but it was ridiculous really. Anyway I blearily staggered onward and eventually made it to the swan center.
As I walked into McDonalds a group of children started screaming and clapping, weird I thought I don’t normally get that reception from kids. Normally a scowl sends them running.
«Hes here» they shouted. All of a sudden the manager came over.
«your late! breakfast is almost over!» it had taken me almost 45 minutes to walk 200 meters, weird.
«its ok I’m here» now I said and started walking towards to the counter.
«No no this way» he said and lead me towards the group of children who were by now really rowdy.
As I was walking over I briefly looked in the window and saw my reflection! Bugger I was dressed as a clown! I’d only been to a fancy dress party the night before.
Anyway before I know it I’m the star attraction at a breakfast party for kids. Well I didnt know what to do? Can you be arrested for impersonating a clown? I wasnt sure so i rolled with it. They were not a bad bunch I guess, i managed to snaffle a few bits of food and a swig of coke over the next 4 hours! But I was very busy, making Balloon animals (mostly snakes), impressions (mostly of a drunk clown) comedy falls (mainly on my head)! You name it I did it.
Anyway eventually the sheer amount of sugar and salt eaten by the children led to a sort of animal farm scenario. The last time I saw them they had run into the cinema during a showing of Noah shouting «Save the cats, save the cats!» I think the local vet tranquilized them with ketamine and the place was saved.
Well once the kids had gone, I managed to change my clothes a bit so I looked less like a clown and ordered a Big Mac Meal.
HEAVEN! After a very trying but entertaining morning and afternoon I managed get my Hangover cure and jogged back to my house.
Thanks McDonalds, although I thought you could have paid me more than a free voucher for a hot apple pie.

Hey, it McDonalds what more do you want?! McDonalds at the Swan Centre has been very handy for me returning from nights out — late opening times is a bonus at the weekends. It’s a nice place to go in to since the McCafe revamp a few years ago and it is being kept quite clean since. The have always been friendly to me. The service is quick like you would expect and the twisty fries are awesome!
Good for hunger heads, end of the night heading home and need food heads, and happy meal heads!

Wow. I have never tasted food like that before. AMAZING!
To start, I thought the customer service was that worthy of heavens angels as I was greeted by the most attractive young lady, well dressed and busty also. I felt as soon as I walked in the door, either it was the enchanting burst of air that softly breathed on me from the air conditioning as I entered, or that I was a little high… from the illuring fragrance of the freshly cooked cusine, I felt as if I was a king in in his royal dining hall. I was led to the best available seat and my order was taken and delivered to me in under a minute. I particularly admired the trust element the staff have with you as they allow you to eat your meal and then decide upon leaving if they deserve to be payed.
I ordered the famous BigMac Meal ©. with a large soda (orange). and a side order of traditional 6 McChicken Nuggets ©.
Having had McDonalds nightmares before, I was not about to dive into this feast despite the initial awe of this paticular branch. I decided to tackle the mountainous proportion of thick, fried in delicious buttery oil, fresh french fries. I was dumbstruck. Melt in your mouth chunky potatoes picked from the garden of Eden is not even close to what it felt like eating. The perfect amount of salt, pepper and spices. Fat complimentary ketchup satchels that must have been made in the back stores by the angel staff members as they tasted unbelievably fresh, worthy of the beloved Uncle Bens’ Sauce range.
The Famous BigMac Burger ©. was mammoth I thought. Nevertheless, I enter the neatly rapped package. Delving into the first bite I was hit with an ecstasy rush to senses. I was paralyzed where I sat. thankfully, all my friends were in a similar situation and I was not ridiculed for my unstoppable drooling and pant wetting. The mightly monster burger I forced myself to finish because its excellence just about outweighed its gigantic proportion and elegant texture. Drowning my little guilty pleasure in the orange soda, standard excellence of CokeCola ©, I floated out of the romantically lit establishment on the waves of soothing music that dreamy soothed out of the walls. I paid the full amount plus a 1000 $ tip as I felt they could not improve their service, but with a little extra cash, I cheekily challenged them to try.
Absolutely Magnificent!

Great staff — the ones that speak English that. They have a guy working there with a slight mental illness and he is just the cutest. Always has a smile on his face and waves at you. He brightens that McDonalds like you wouldn’t believe it.

Ah McDonalds Rathmines, you’ve done it again, and I’m upgrading you to 5 stars!!!
Amazing customer service, every time.
So picture this… next Saturday morning.
Me = hungover.
You = cheeseburger with a smile.
It’s a date.